Topic: Timing & Persistence
Timing & persistence can be an essential component to improving eye contact and communication with your child. Here are some techniques to help with your timing. Timing With Toys & Games:
Is your child in the middle of an “ism” when you are offering a toy? Perhaps (s)he is not involved enough with you in that moment to take an interest. Be aware of your child’s attentiveness to you before offering games or toys as it may be harder for him/her if (s)he is less involved and easier to participate when (s)he is more involved. Persistence:
If (s)he pushes a toy away, or says “no” – respond and put it away. Then, wait a few minutes and offer something else, or the same thing again… persist!
What are you offering? Are the games being offered related to their natural interests? Perhaps you need to spend time as a team, discussing what your child likes, their areas of motivation, and creating games and activities which relate. (For example: If your child likes toys made of sponges: can we introduce letters and numbers cut from sponge material? If he likes trains, can we create a fun game where we throw a ball to each other and I give him/her a ride on my back like I am a train?) If you can offer items which include your child’s interest, this will greatly increase their tendency to participate. If your child wants to go out of the room, the most important factor is how you are feeling. If you do not feel that good during those moments, start there. Really focus on knowing that your child is doing the very best that he can. If (s)he could do it more easily, (s)he would. And you are doing your best too. Focus on the love you feel for your child and, although this may sound funny, don’t feel that you have to stop them from going to the door or even crying. You can be honest with him/her and explain what time the door will open. You can explain to him/her, “honey, even if you cry, the door isn’t going to open until _____”. Be aware of whether or not you might be physically moving quickly when (s)he acts this way, or trying to get him/her away from the door in such a way that you might be more interesting than when (s)he isn’t at the door. You could even go to another part of the room and play by yourself for a while, and see if (s)he comes over. Tell your child you want to play with them and that you will start a game, and when (s)he is ready, (s)he can come and join you! It is important for you to find ways to continually keep yourself excited and motivated for your Son-Rise Program to be successful. For example, try reading the book “Happiness Is A Choice
” or watch some of the videos we have available on our YouTube channel
. All of these things will help you to feel optimistic, upbeat and passionate about helping your child. Source: Bryn N. Hogan, Q&A Session 3 with the Director of The Son-Rise Program